Many of us, especially parents, feel guilty about indulging ourselves every now and then. We are programmed by life to think that we must serve our children’s needs and wishes first, and then our own. Or, we subject our own happiness to that of others, such as our bosses, our friends and family, life in general. Although there is definitely a time and place for selflessness and nurturing others ahead of yourself, there is also definitely a time to nurture yourself. There is nothing wrong with it!
No, you aren’t being selfish when you take care of your personal needs. Getting a new haircut or a manicure or buying yourself something you have longed for for years isn’t sinful or wrong. Why? Because we deserve to receive nurturing. We deserve to receive the good things in life.
Another thing to watch out for is not caring for ourselves. Many, many mothers do this: they neglect their own health and well-being in favor of that of their own families. But this is so very destructive! Have you heard of the phrase, “Healer, heal thyself!” This ancient Greek saying pinpoints the fact that it is impossible for the nurturer to properly nurture if they are in need of nurturing themselves! If you neglect your health, fitness, body image, personal time, etc., you will not be able to give back at the level you should. Your actions will have less impact. Sure, you may be a martyr…but your effectiveness is diminished. In order to be truly powerful, we have to care for ourselves and not neglect our bodies, minds and spirits.
If you want to examine a concrete example, think of the life of Jesus. He is someone who died for the sins of us all—but he still took the time to go apart and pray, nurturing his relationship with God. He still took time to be with His family and friends, enjoying their company. He gave to others, but He did not neglect himself. By taking care of Himself, He was able to be in the position to provide the ultimate example of nurturing to humanity, His sacrifice for our sins.
So don’t neglect yourself. Make the time to nurture your body through exercise, eating right, and making yourself more attractive. Nurture your mind by engaging in stimulating and fulfilling activities and interacting with those you love, just for the fun of it. Nurture your spirit by taking the time to meditate and pray. By caring for yourself you put yourself in the position to care more for others, to cast more positive ripples out that will influence others, to be more than you thought possible.
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